Child Safe
By Neil A. Hogan
The interplanetary ship banked to the left, turning slightly, attempting a landing.
A bright white blast of light shot out from the control center, and the vehicle was instantly vaporised.
Jo’sev looked through the observation tower window at the raining ash in shock.
“Why?” he asked, blue veins sticking out of his forehead in anger, his lips quivering.
“It wasn’t going right,” said the alien lizard, tapping absently at the red button on the console.
“But, civilians?” Jo’sev said, staring at him incredulously. “You killed them without warning!”
“What does this button do?” the alien’s translator croaked, ignoring Jo’sev completely, fascinated by the console.
“Don’t touch that, please,” Jo’sev yelled, pushing the alien claw away, shaking.
The alien lizard-creature pulled himself up to his full eight feet and towered over Jo’sev.
“You have no right to be here,” Jo’sev continued, feeling braver, realising the creature could kill him at any second without a thought, whatever he did.
“I’ll get my mummy on you if you are bad to me,” croaked its translator.
Jo’sev took a step back, and blinked.
Mummy?
He wasn’t dealing with a super-intelligent, invading alien bent on world domination. He was dealing with a wayward child. A big wayward child, though probably still bent on world domination.
Like most children.
He took a deep breath, looked directly into one of the yellow cat-like eyes of the alien, and smiled.
“Oh, of course not,” he said, using his best dad voice. “You want to play? I’ve got more fun things over here. Look at these cool buttons. You’ll love them.”
“Where?” the lizardese translator croaked.
Jo’sev led the hulking alien over to another part of the traffic control centre.
The automated teleport system.
“What do you think?” he asked the alien, which had lumbered after him. “Look over at that wall. See all the cute buttons?” Jo’sev pointed his fingers at the teleportation system wall.
The alien stopped, and looked down at him. The yellow eyes on both sides of its head flicking back and forth. Thinking.
For a moment Jo’sev feared he’d been figured out. That the alien was smarter than he had thought. It had learnt how to use the defence systems very quickly. It had teleported here, perhaps it recognised the system.
“Awesome,” the alien’s translator said, and it bounded over to the transmission standing area.
Immediately, Jo’sev activated the teleport, choosing the fast return switch, and the alien simply faded away, the system scanning its frequency, detecting its previous location, and reversing its path.
Jo’sev leaned against the console and breathed heavily, thinking about the spaceship of civilians that the creature had destroyed.
What was he going to tell everyone? He was the only one on duty at this late hour. Would he be accused of killing them all? Would he be believed?
Then he remembered with relief. Everything had been monitored by the internal cameras, and he should get a call from the military at any second.
Just then, the communicator beeped, and his immediate superior was yelling in his ear.
“We’ve captured the aliens and their families,” General Tennant said. “But we’ve also got a group of civs that have suddenly appeared in our hangers. I think this is the start of an invasion and we should kill the lot of them.”
Jo’sev looked dumbfounded at the speaker system. What? Relief, then disbelief, then horror.
He had to stop the army.
“No, wait,” he said, thinking fast. “The alien child sent those civs to safety before destroying the ship. The aliens don’t want to hurt, or kill, or invade, they just want to play. Don’t kill them.”
There was a painfully long pause as the General processed this information.
“Acknowledged,” said the General.
Jo’sev collapsed onto a nearby chair, gasping for breath. That was close.
“Civs are your responsibility. What do you want done with them?” said the General.
“Send them over,” he said. He’d organise transport for them and send them on their way.
When the general released the alien families, he was sure the child would want to visit again, and would probably bring its friends. Maybe even have a party. For interstellar relations, he knew it would have to be allowed.
In which case, there was only one thing his air traffic control center could do.
Make everything child-safe.